Have You Ever Taken Yourself on a Blind Date?
A blind date is dinner with someone you know absolutely nothing about while privately hoping he has all his teeth, chews with his mouth closed, and does not spend forty-five minutes explaining his gallbladder surgery.
Person A asks Person B questions. Person B answers and asks questions of Person A. This continues until they discover something they have in common, fall madly in love, or one of them begins calculating whether she can pay the check and escape before dessert.
It recently occurred to me that I need to take myself on a blind date.
Apparently, I have been ghosting myself for years.
I know I am not the woman I was five years ago, much less ten. Yet I have been so busy surviving, adapting, solving problems, and handling whatever fresh foolishness arrived at my door that I never stopped to meet the woman all that living created.
I assume I know her because we live together. We share a bathroom. I know how she takes her coffee, which chair she prefers, and exactly how long she can tolerate people before wanting to go home.
But familiarity is not intimacy.
Do I know what she believes now? What delights her? What bores the hell out of her?
What is she still doing because some former version of herself signed an imaginary lifetime contract and neglected to include a cancellation clause?
So I think I shall take this woman somewhere pleasant. I’ll wear something that makes me feel fabulous, order exactly what I want, put my phone away, and try not to interrupt her with answers pulled from an old file.
Do you still believe that?
Do you still want that?
Is that still your dream, or have you been faithfully dragging around the dream of a woman who packed up and left years ago?
That may be one of the strangest parts of growing older. We change so gradually that we fail to notice a new woman has moved in.
And if I am going to spend the rest of my life with her, it seems only polite to buy her dinner and find out who the hell she is.
That is exactly why I created ReFoundation. . It is a way of becoming reacquainted with the woman you are now, beneath all the roles, obligations, assumptions, and old decisions that may no longer fit. If your blind date with yourself leaves you wanting a second date, ReFoundation will help you continue the conversation.
If you choose to become a paid subscriber today, ReFoundation is included at no additional cost and will be waiting for you to download from the Perks page.
And one small side note: all annual subscriptions are 10% off through September 30.
And if something in this piece made you pause, nod, or feel a little less alone — please give it a heart before you go. That one small tap tells the algorithm this conversation matters. It puts these words in front of another woman who needs to hear them today. She's out there. Help me find her.