I think this is what I needed to hear this morning. I've been in this middle place for awhile now, at least 6 months. No real motivation for anything, I can cry over nothing, like you, a movie or something I've read on substack. I'm feeling lost and in the wrong place, but stuck at the same time. Not sure what I need to do differently to change this.
Oh friend, I feel this so deeply. That “middle place” you’re in? It’s not failure. It’s not stuck. It’s the sacred in-between—the space between what’s no longer true and what hasn’t fully formed yet.
I’ve been there. More than once. And what finally helped me move through it wasn’t pushing or fixing—it was learning how to be in that space with gentleness, breath, and soul-level listening.
If that resonates, you might really connect with something I created called The Breakthrough Guide. It was born out of exactly this kind of season.
Right now, I’m leading a small four-week workshop using that guide—it’s included for paid subscribers, who also get the guide free. But if you’d rather start quietly on your own, you can always grab the guide by itself and work through it at your own pace.
Either way, just know this: you’re not broken. You’re in the middle of becoming. And you’re not alone.
I, too, am in the messy middle. I know I’ve outgrown my former self, but not exactly sure who the new me is either. I’ve caught glimpses of her, tried to wLk in her shoes, but never for long enough yet. She is still etherial, like an airy dream. And like a dream, as soon as I get caught up in “life”, the vision is gone. Thats why this year, I took a brave step to going part-time at work, so I can have more time to think about her and go out into the world wearing her shoes.
Oh, friend… everything you just wrote sounds like a soul trying to get your attention. That fog, the tears, the tug of something shifting underneath it all—that’s not confusion. That’s the early stage of clarity. It just doesn’t speak in full sentences yet.
One of the things I’ve learned (and now teach) is how to recognize the difference between an ego nudge and a soul nudge—and how to trust yourself enough to act only when the soul says yes.
That’s exactly what the Breakthrough Guide was designed to help with.
And right now, I’m walking through it in real time with a small circle of women in a gentle, four-week workshop space. It’s free for paid subscribers, and it’s built for exactly this season you’re in—the middle space, the fog, the wondering what’s next.
If it feels like your soul’s giving you a nudge to join us… follow it.
We’re not in a rush. We’re just learning how to listen better.
When I was married I was "Mrs Ashley Hobson III" (I was his 3rd wife, he, my 3rd husband). When he died, I became "Ashley's Widow" and I got some perverse kind of satisfaction in living in that persona. Until I didn't. So who the fritz am I after being married to one person or another since I was just 20 & widowed at 58 (now 65). It has taken me 7 years to investigate, weed out and nourish the seed of me! Now that seed is growing - hesitantly at times - sometimes it wilts a bit, sometimes it almost flowers, but growth is still evident and it's writers such as yourself Monica, my yoga therapist and valued friends that continue to "cultivate" me. thank you.
Downton Abbey, beyond the beautiful costumes, the glorious setting, the cinematography, has always been about human beings going through human things. I’m thinking of the gay butler, Thomas, played beautifully by Robert James-Collier who at first seems nasty and completely unlikeable but who evolves into a beautiful, complex character.
I actually had the same reaction, sort of surprisingly, watching an episode of season 8 Game Of Thrones, where Theon Greyjoy, played by Alfie Allen, finds redemption through love and heroism. Lots of ugly crying.
Reminders that humans can be exceptionally brave and beautiful. We so need that right now!
I also cried buckets at the end of the last Downton film. I have always loved the series, the music. We lived in a Victorian terrace when Downton began and had all the period details and the antique furniture and even had the bespoke Downton lampshades made at a place in Harrogate. The series was always a backdrop to our lives and a great comfort and escape when we were going through tough times and good. We are older now and have moved and downsized several times, and l suppose the tears reflected an ending for us too.
Thank you for giving a name to my angst. It seems most every morning I choke up or just plain sob over one story or another. I feel hollowed out, but I also have feelings of determination that I haven’t felt for a while. It’s the determination that is keeping me moving forward.
Thankyou Monica. It doesn't help that I'm living with my son and his wife. They are veterans with PTSD and also going through empty nesting and so here I am..duh. It's time to leave and move on for both me and for them. But where is the question????
I think this is what I needed to hear this morning. I've been in this middle place for awhile now, at least 6 months. No real motivation for anything, I can cry over nothing, like you, a movie or something I've read on substack. I'm feeling lost and in the wrong place, but stuck at the same time. Not sure what I need to do differently to change this.
Oh friend, I feel this so deeply. That “middle place” you’re in? It’s not failure. It’s not stuck. It’s the sacred in-between—the space between what’s no longer true and what hasn’t fully formed yet.
I’ve been there. More than once. And what finally helped me move through it wasn’t pushing or fixing—it was learning how to be in that space with gentleness, breath, and soul-level listening.
If that resonates, you might really connect with something I created called The Breakthrough Guide. It was born out of exactly this kind of season.
Right now, I’m leading a small four-week workshop using that guide—it’s included for paid subscribers, who also get the guide free. But if you’d rather start quietly on your own, you can always grab the guide by itself and work through it at your own pace.
Either way, just know this: you’re not broken. You’re in the middle of becoming. And you’re not alone.
I, too, am in the messy middle. I know I’ve outgrown my former self, but not exactly sure who the new me is either. I’ve caught glimpses of her, tried to wLk in her shoes, but never for long enough yet. She is still etherial, like an airy dream. And like a dream, as soon as I get caught up in “life”, the vision is gone. Thats why this year, I took a brave step to going part-time at work, so I can have more time to think about her and go out into the world wearing her shoes.
Oh, friend… everything you just wrote sounds like a soul trying to get your attention. That fog, the tears, the tug of something shifting underneath it all—that’s not confusion. That’s the early stage of clarity. It just doesn’t speak in full sentences yet.
One of the things I’ve learned (and now teach) is how to recognize the difference between an ego nudge and a soul nudge—and how to trust yourself enough to act only when the soul says yes.
That’s exactly what the Breakthrough Guide was designed to help with.
And right now, I’m walking through it in real time with a small circle of women in a gentle, four-week workshop space. It’s free for paid subscribers, and it’s built for exactly this season you’re in—the middle space, the fog, the wondering what’s next.
If it feels like your soul’s giving you a nudge to join us… follow it.
We’re not in a rush. We’re just learning how to listen better.
When I was married I was "Mrs Ashley Hobson III" (I was his 3rd wife, he, my 3rd husband). When he died, I became "Ashley's Widow" and I got some perverse kind of satisfaction in living in that persona. Until I didn't. So who the fritz am I after being married to one person or another since I was just 20 & widowed at 58 (now 65). It has taken me 7 years to investigate, weed out and nourish the seed of me! Now that seed is growing - hesitantly at times - sometimes it wilts a bit, sometimes it almost flowers, but growth is still evident and it's writers such as yourself Monica, my yoga therapist and valued friends that continue to "cultivate" me. thank you.
So many of us have a similar story and they’re part of the pack here in our community within Monirose Soul. Glad you are part of it!
Downton Abbey, beyond the beautiful costumes, the glorious setting, the cinematography, has always been about human beings going through human things. I’m thinking of the gay butler, Thomas, played beautifully by Robert James-Collier who at first seems nasty and completely unlikeable but who evolves into a beautiful, complex character.
I actually had the same reaction, sort of surprisingly, watching an episode of season 8 Game Of Thrones, where Theon Greyjoy, played by Alfie Allen, finds redemption through love and heroism. Lots of ugly crying.
Reminders that humans can be exceptionally brave and beautiful. We so need that right now!
Hi Monica - how do I access the ‘Breakthrough Guide’ I am a subscriber 🙏 thanks
send me a DM with your email address, I will send you an email with the pdf attached. thx.
Hi Monica - Barb Cove my email is ebarbgum@yahoo.co.uk many thanks
I also cried buckets at the end of the last Downton film. I have always loved the series, the music. We lived in a Victorian terrace when Downton began and had all the period details and the antique furniture and even had the bespoke Downton lampshades made at a place in Harrogate. The series was always a backdrop to our lives and a great comfort and escape when we were going through tough times and good. We are older now and have moved and downsized several times, and l suppose the tears reflected an ending for us too.
Thank you, Monica, your post definitely spoke to me, and comforted me. I appreciate your honesty and your words. 🧡
Thank you for giving a name to my angst. It seems most every morning I choke up or just plain sob over one story or another. I feel hollowed out, but I also have feelings of determination that I haven’t felt for a while. It’s the determination that is keeping me moving forward.
Thankyou Monica. It doesn't help that I'm living with my son and his wife. They are veterans with PTSD and also going through empty nesting and so here I am..duh. It's time to leave and move on for both me and for them. But where is the question????