Someone tried to sell me soap for smelling like an old woman.
Fear is being marketed to women our age everywhere you look. This week, one reader almost fell for it — and one comment reminded me exactly why I write for you.
Community of ladies on Substack and mutual support!
This was one of those weeks that kept surprising me. Grab a cup, I’d like to tell you about it.
Nothing dramatic happened, yet several conversations kept circling the same idea. And I know that you know it’s in conversations between girlfriends where the good stuff is!
Not until this morning, sitting here with coffee in hand, did all the pieces suddenly fit together.
This week reminded me how easily fear can become someone else’s personal road map, and how powerful it is when we begin trusting ourselves again.
This week started with a live video recorded on a whim after watching a YouTube video declaring that isolation is devastating for older adults. That statement bothered me because it was so absolute. Some people suffer terribly from isolation. Others discover themselves there.
The Live button got hit fifteen minutes later.
No idea existed that the conversation would become one of the most watched videos this month. At the time of this writing, over 8k have viewed that video. Color me astonished, amazed, and humbled.
What surprised me even more was one woman’s comment.
She admitted she had been ready to buy one of those “special soaps” being promoted on Facebook for older people telling older women they probably smelled bad and didn’t know it.
She thanked me for providing proof she did not need that soap!
That one comment is a reminder of why these conversations matter.
It struck me that fear is being marketed to women my age everywhere I look.
Fear that we’re lonely.
Fear that we’re declining.
Fear that we’re becoming irrelevant.
Fear that we’re somehow no longer capable of making good decisions.
What’s happening together here is different.
We’re not trying to become fearless.
We’re learning to trust ourselves a more than we trust the fear.
The Community
This was probably my favorite part of the week.
Several conversations kept happening in the comments of my Notes, entirely without another word from me.
Women were talking to each other.
Encouraging each other.
Telling the truth to each other.
That’s the community I’ve been hoping would grow.
Not one built around me.
One built around us.
Here’s to my favorite note of the week: About Anti- Ageing cream:
Here’s Where the Conversation Expanded On-Line
If any of these conversations speak to where you are today, I’d love for you to read them.
Is Isolation Really Devastating for Older Adults? Why I pushed back against one of the biggest myths about aging.
They Started Preparing for My Old Age Before I Did. A funny story that turned into a much bigger conversation about identity
Is Everyone Burned Out... or Are We Asking the Wrong Question? Why I think we may be asking the wrong question.
Remember to check the Notes feature on Substack — there are some really juicy conversations occurring there.
As always, thank you for walking through these conversations with me.
This little corner of the internet keeps reminding me that we’re not trying to fix ourselves.
We’re simply remembering who we were before fear, obligation, and everyone else’s expectations got so loud.
Glad you’re here.
Have a beautiful week.
Monica
PS: An agreement is now official with a truly wonderful Medicare specialist. Stay tuned — more details are coming soon. She’ll be available to any of you wanting to talk through Medicare, supplementals, and all the fine print that comes with it.
Also on the horizon: a handful of special little “flip books” are about to make their debut. Stay tuned on that one too.
Send me a message if you want first notice when either of these go live
Sadly, women have endured fear marketing for most of our lives: too fat, too thin, not ambitious enough, too ambitious, too involved as a parent, too remote as a parent, and on it goes until now we’re told to fear being too smelly!