Women Over 60: We Were Duped About Where Our Value Lives
Reimagining life after the roles fade.
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Let me say this as plainly as I can.
We were duped.
Not about something small or easily fixed. We were duped about something foundational — something quietly woven into everything we were taught — so completely that most of us never even noticed.
We were taught that our value lives outside of us.
Not in a single classroom or sermon, but in a thousand tiny daily lessons that built a belief we never consciously chose. A belief we’ve been living inside ever since.
If someone needs you, you matter.
If someone chooses you, you matter.
If someone praises you, you matter.
If someone depends on you, you matter.
And when none of that is happening?
You start scanning yourself for what’s wrong.
That’s the setup. That’s the lie. And most of us don’t find out it was a lie until the thing — the job, the marriage, the children, the usefulness — gets lighter, or disappears entirely.
And suddenly, we’re standing in the middle of our own lives wondering why we feel like we’ve been erased.
Honey, you weren’t erased.
You were just running software that was never yours to begin with.
The DoorDash Lesson
Yesterday, I learned something from a delayed DoorDash order.
I watched that little car icon crawl toward my house for two hours — updating, delaying, rerouting, disappearing. Never arrived.
The old me — the one who measured her worth by her productivity — would’ve been climbing the walls. Two hours wasted.
But here’s what really happened.
My daughter called. And because I wasn’t busy being useful, because I had nowhere to be and nothing to prove, we talked. We talked about art, about Norman Rockwell, about beauty and what it does to a person when they let it in.
It was one of the best conversations we’ve had in years.
Would it have happened if I’d been productive? Probably not.
And yet, I almost missed it. I could have spent those two hours in low-grade fury — at the app, at Kevin the driver, at life itself — instead of receiving what was being offered.
Because for most of my life, I was trained to measure time by what I produced in it.
That training almost cost me an afternoon with my daughter.
The Missing Piece
This space is where we practice coming home to ourselves.
Not in theory. In lived, daily experience.
No self-help hustle. No performance. Currently I am offering annual membership at 20% off its regular price plus a free BREAKTHROUGH WORKBOOK. Shocked full of process to help you develop your own unique passions.